| So, you think your ready to move in after dating your | | | | seem as though you're in a power struggle, but when |
| partner for a little while. Certainly you find all of their | | | | you complain about his dirty laundry on the floor or he |
| idiosyncrasies to be charming at this stage; after all, | | | | complains about your bras on the dining room chair, |
| you're in love, right? Before you welcome their | | | | then you have a power struggle. How are you going |
| awesome Lazy Boy chair or sniffing poodle into your | | | | to manage disagreements? Conflicts? Before you |
| pad, you need to consider a few things. Moving in | | | | move in, you need to set some ground rules on |
| together is not just a mater of logistics, there's quite a | | | | disagreements and conflicts. How will you handle |
| bit of emotional adjustment to consider | | | | them? The best way is to agree to take a time out |
| Lifestyle Considerations | | | | when it comes to conflicts. Realize that you're in an |
| Sure, you both enjoy Starbucks on a Sunday morning, | | | | argument and that you both need to take some time |
| or an occasional walk along the beach, but are you | | | | to cool down and set a time to return to discuss the |
| ready to make a lifestyle change? Starbucks and | | | | situation. Trying to out do each other in an argument, or |
| romantic walks are one thing; blending two lifestyles | | | | "be right" will only lead to hurt feelings and more |
| can be another. You need to take into consideration | | | | arguing. |
| both lifestyles and see if they will compliment each | | | | Dollars and Sense |
| other or clash. Take an inventory of both of your | | | | Lets face it, more relationships end over money |
| habits; does he like to party a lot, does she sleep in | | | | matters than any other issue. So, it's a good idea to |
| while you like to get up early. Ask yourself if you can | | | | address the issues of finance before any furniture is |
| accommodate any of your partner's habits. | | | | moved and any bathroom accessories are purchased. |
| Are There Children Involved? | | | | Topics for discussion should be, are you having |
| Children are a full time job. If your partner does not | | | | separate checking accounts? Who pays what bills or |
| have any children or doesn't have any young children | | | | do you combine your money and pay the bills |
| living at home, then you want to sit down and discuss | | | | together? If children are responsible, is your childless |
| the issues involved in blending a family. Some things to | | | | partner going to help out financially? Financial matters |
| discuss are who is the disciplinarian. If you both do, | | | | are one of the biggest issues that must be worked out |
| what are the rules for discipline? How involved will your | | | | prior to moving in or even getting married. Take this |
| partner be in the lives of the children? What are your | | | | topic serious. There are circumstances where one |
| expectations of your partner when it comes to your | | | | person is the breadwinner while the other partner |
| children? All of these issues need to be discussed prior | | | | tends to home and children issues. Whatever the |
| to moving in. Don't make assumptions when it comes | | | | situation, discuss it with each other. |
| to children. | | | | Living together is a big life-changing event. It's a far cry |
| Balance of Powers | | | | from playing house when you where in kindergarten. |
| Remember again, you are merging to personalities; | | | | There are certain issues that must be worked out |
| there will be a power struggle at times. It may not | | | | before you embark on cohabitation. |