| The expectations of women have changed drastically | | | | joined one of the large public accounting firms. At 28, I |
| over the past 100 years, but for many women being a | | | | married and was less focused on creating a family |
| mother is just as important today as it was a century | | | | than I was about climbing the career ladder. After |
| ago. I remember having a conversation with my | | | | three years of marriage, my professional drive was |
| grandmother when I was in my twenties. We were | | | | replaced by my desire to become a mother, and my |
| sitting in her living room; me on her white, green, and | | | | husband, Dave, and I embarked on the journey of |
| blue flowered couch and she in her green antique chair. | | | | trying to become pregnant. |
| She was probing me about what my career choice | | | | I was surprised to find that my interest in my career |
| was going to be; she wanted me to pursue a business | | | | waned the longer my husband and I struggled to |
| career, as she had done. My grandmother had been a | | | | create a family. At the same time, I was concerned |
| successful businesswoman who did not have her first | | | | that once I became a mother I would be too focused |
| child until she was 35 (something unheard of in the | | | | on my career and become the poor mother my |
| 1940s) and who continued to work full-time thereafter. | | | | grandmother predicted. A friend of mine, who is a |
| She asked me if I wanted to have children. I described | | | | business coach, used his skills to help me gain comfort |
| a perfect blend of career and motherhood where I | | | | that I would make the best decision for me and my |
| would work part-time and dedicate the rest of my | | | | hoped-for children. |
| time to raising my children. To my surprise she lectured | | | | My twin daughters almost four years old. I've made a |
| me about what a poor mother I would be if I chose to | | | | conscious decision to work less than full-time so that I |
| work. Looking back at this conversation, I cannot help | | | | can take an active part in raising my kids. Many of my |
| but wonder if her attitude toward me was a reflection | | | | friends are stay-at-home moms while others have |
| of her own life and her regrets for choosing career | | | | chosen to or must work. The balance of career and |
| over motherhood. Her son, my biological father, was | | | | family can be a delicate one. I for one know that I am |
| not a good dad so I think her disappointment toward | | | | a better mom when I am with my girls because I also |
| me that day was really the remorse she felt about her | | | | continue to experience the challenges and growth that |
| choices in balancing work and family and the effect it | | | | can only be found in the business environment. Each |
| had on her son. | | | | woman should strive to find the balance that is right for |
| In the end, I pursued my career first. Out of college I | | | | her. |